It's my birthday today and it would appear that, against all the odds, I've reached the ripe old age of 45...

f%&k!

I'm guessing most folk reflect back on the last twelve months at new years. I get to do it a few days early, what with my birthday being on Christmas Eve an' all. 45... 45... no matter how many times I say it, it just doesn't seem... I don't know what I'm trying to say here. I never had a problem with turning 40 so why the issue with 45? Perhaps it's because the year started out with so much promise. I'd discovered Green Door and I'd begun to produce work that I was actually proud to put my name to. I even sold a few pieces early on. I was to be included in a book that was to be sent out to agency's around the country. There were communications with someone who wanted to sell by work through their new web site. My work was to be on permanent display as part of an ongoing show.

But mid year, everything started to go tit's up. My office announced that it was moving so my visits to the studio were looking in doubt (it's still ify on that front). There has been no news or further developments on either the book or the new web site. The Café Zen exhibit folded early because of problems with the owner. And, probably worst of all, I feel like all the drive that I'd had at the beginning of the year has deserted me.

Roll on 2010. Perhaps I'll get my mojo back then.

It's Christmas time once again and my favourite festive event is imminent. That's right, the Doctor Who Christmas special will air in two days...well, what else did you think I was talking about?

I've been a fan of the Dr. since I was old enough to be able to turn on the family black and white T.V. and to mark such an auspicious event as the ushering in of a new Dr. I thought I'd sketch a few of his previous incarnations.

Even though I was too young to remember William Hartnells portrayal (63-66), I did catch up with these episodes many, many years later. His Dr. was foreboding, mysterious and down right scary. A great place to start.

Patric Troughton (66-69) just made it into my child hood memory. It was his last episode which was actually my first Dr. experience. Which instantly confused me as, just as we had met, he changed into John Pertwee. Go figure. But from there I was hooked and spent every Saturday evening watching the Dr.'s amazing adventures. Troughton to Pertwee to Baker.

Then I 'grew up' and the Dr. and I parted company. It would not be until years later that Paul McGann took up the mantle in a mid-nineties T.V. movie. An event that was integral in Helen an I getting together. It actually wasn't bad. A little too Hollywood perhaps, but a good attempt at relaunching the franchise.

2005 rolled around and the Dr. was back for good in the form of Chris Eccleston. Not only was the Dr. back but so was I, back on the sofa, just waiting for the inevitable Dalek appearance.

Then came David Tennant, without 'who' the show might have become just another remake (I'm thinking about V, has anyone seen that?). But Dave's moving on and handing the keys to the Tardis to a would be time lord, Matt Smith.

As the Dr. knows only too well, time marches on. This could be where the series takes a serious nose dive but I've my fingers crossed that that wont happen.

Don't let me down, Matt.

So, we are now rushing headlong into the madness that is known as Christmas.

I've never been 'into' Christmas, despite having my birthday on Christmas Eve (that's right, another few hours and I might have been called Noel). My family are not what you'd call 'close knit' and we don't live in each others pockets. It's a case of knowing that each of us is just on the other end of a 'phone should we need each other. In day's gone by, on the odd occasion that you'd find us all occupying the same space at the same time, it'd be at our folk's house. Now that they are no longer around though, we only ever get together for a brief few hours one day before Christmas to exchange gifts. So that's what is going on at the moment. The logistics of this annual event is currently being orchestrated by one of my sisters. She 'phones back and forth, checking and cross checking available dates with us until we all fit into place on the right one. It's kind of like waiting for the stars to be in the correct alignment.

The other major event in my life, the office move, is casting an ominous shadow over any festive cheer that I might have. Most of my work colleges are really troubled by the thought of this move. Some are in denial, some are depressed, most are just miserable.

Because of this upheaval I'm still trying to sort out how my studio visits will fit into the working week. I could really do with a big Lottery win or finding a generous benefactor to fund my dreams. Neither are looking too imminent. Perhaps father Christmas will pay me a visit with a big, fat cheque.

So I'm doodling when I can but, to be honest, the wind has kind of gone out of my sails. This was the last thing I drew, a sketch of Sir Ian Mckellan which I posted on Skineart last week.

After my sorry episode of defeatist outpourings yesterday, here is something that really made me laugh. Thank God for the Muppets.

It's been a little over a year since I began to take my print making seriously, due in no small part to the discovery of Green Door print making studio. If I can I'll spend a day a week there executing work that I've spent the intervening days working on. It was a case of being in the right lace at the right time, although it had taken me years to stumble upon this great space. Now, it seems, things are starting to unravel.

All the work that I've put into these short months might have been for nought. The organisation that I work for is moving office in January, and although this is just a few miles away, the combination of my current work pattern and having to rely on public transport might mean that I have to give up my mid week day off.

I'm gutted. I'm doing everything in my power to avoid giving up on my dream of being able to support myself from my art. I'm forty five, for fucks sake...time's running out.

I could get another job, but let's face it, who's going to employ a guy who's just pushed buttons for the last twenty years?

I have a small studio at home but it's nowhere big enough to print in.

I don't know what I'll do If I lose this...this last chance.

Friday the 14th of November saw the opening of the new Nottingham Contemporary gallery and as mentioned in my last post, Helen and I went to see what all the fuss was about.

The 20th was our tenth wedding anniversary and, as we had met some thirteen years earlier during a life drawing class, it was only appropriate that we should celebrate this land mark occasion in an 'artsy' kind of way.

The inaugural exhibition was a show of David Hockney's work from 1960-1968. Only being familiar with his later work it was great to see some of his stuff from his formative years, which was a selection of his drawing, etchings, screen prints and some early paintings. If later shows are as good as this then Nottingham can be really proud of its new exhibition space.

The gallery building itself is not in the league of some of the grander structures, which in my opinion, often overshadow the work that they showcase. The N.C. is an understated concrete and metal building which tips it's hat to the heritage of Nottingham in the lace impressions of its facade. And the inside is as architecturaly neutral as the outside, offering no distraction from the reason that you are there, which is to admire good art.

If you are in Nottingham, go and pay the gallery a visit. The Hockney show is on until 24th Jan 2010.

It's not safe out there...

in cyber-space that is. All manner of nasty things floating around in the digital aether. Like this 'Advanced Virus Removal'. Christ knows where this came from but it caused hell in my box of tricks. It's some sort of trojan and hijacks everything. Your browser, task manager, run command line, system restore, reg edit. Man, what a nightmare. Until I found those nice people at Bleeping Computer who pointed me to this wonderful little program by Malwarebytes. This beauty cleaned everything up and put everything back to normal. Hurrah, panic over...till next time.

Still working on those little pieces that I mentioned in the post from the beginning of November. A couple of weeks should have this licked. I'm also working on some concept ideas for a graphic novel that I'm trying to put together. I mentioned it way back in August last year and so far that's all I've done (procrastination is my middle name). Well, I'm thinking of maybe putting it online instead, as a web strip. It's called Lupe...that's all I'm saying, the Internet has ears, you know. I'll put some images up once I'm comfortable with the designs.

One last and very important thing. Friday is Helen and mine's TENTH wedding anniversary, woo-hoo!! It's been an awesome the years, not without it's up's and down's but that's what marriage is about, yes. Anyway, because we are absolutely brasic there is no big celebration on the cards, just a low key day together. We'll spend the day strolling around Nottingham and intend to pay a visit to the new Nottingham Contemporary gallery, which opened last Friday. There is an awesome David Hockney exhibition on, can't wait.

A couple more pieces from the Moleskine. Iggy Pop and Vincent Price, both scary dudes.

Quick post. The Silver Surfer image that I posted about on Sept 28th is up over at the Kirby Museum, how cool is that.

Really cool, I think.

As Halloween has just been and gone here are a few monster sketches that I put up on the Comic Geek Speak forum. First the one and only Cookie Monster. Next up is Ro-Man from the B movie Robot Monster. Then we have the Mole-Man's monster from Fantastic Four number 1 and finally the creepiest monster of 'em all, H R Gigers Alien.

I'll be getting back to some 'real' work just as soon as I can. I have a few ideas that are currently fermenting in my tiny brain. I'd like to do some original, one off images. I'm thinking small, six inches square perhaps. Maybe multimedia. Definitely involving an element of screen printing. I might offer them for sale here so watch this space.